Low light murder


I am coming around to the view that it probably is OK to murder people sometimes.  Only for good cause, obviously.

Right now, I would like to murder whoever designed this.

When we had out bathroom done, a while ago, Matt the builder suggested under cabinet lights. Brilliant idea.  You go into the bathroom when it is dark, and a low light comes on automatically.  Just enough to see your way around your own bathroom.  And then back to bed.

Obviously, the bulbs (globes as they call them here in YankOz) blow every few years, and so need changing.  And here is the rub.  To get inside these boys is like breaking into Fort Knox.   When the first one went a while ago, my back was virtually broken by the time I admitted defeat: these things are soldered into the wiring under a bathroom unit, so the whole fight is conducted with one on one’s back, upside down on the bathroom floor with one’s head under a cabinet. Eventually my son Charlie did it (he is now officially a genius, having become a member of Mensa.  I wonder if they have a special division for people who can get into light fittings?)

Now the other one has gone.  Every few days, I have another go.  One can twist the outer thing around a bit, but that doesn’t help. You can pull, and push and probe and plead – nothing I can think of gets you inside the little rotter so as to enable the required bulb changing.  My son Jamie cannot do it either.

And so, here is the question: what sort of demented moron would design a light fitting that is so hard to open? It is not as if a light under a bathroom cabinet needs that much protection.  We have no have sufficiently determined thieves, who will ignore everything else of value in the house in order to steal into our bathroom and try to steal our fucking under-cabinet bulbs!  Someone else has already invented the Rubik’s Cube, so there is no point try to emulate the difficulty of that in a BLOODY LIGHT FITTING!

[At this point, I have deleted the bit about suitable torture etc. Suffice to say that it involves soldering irons and testicles.]


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